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I'm thinking a lot of classes right now, too. Most academics also hate the leading or the following, but there's also this holdover macho power bullshit from before it got more diverse. So there's a residual and powerful expectation to behave that way, even though most people don't actually care for it (of course, there are always still going to be people who just act like that by default, but they aren't the majority). But, in that case, when confronting new people, that's what's so beautiful you don't have to enforce any rules at all. Ideally, you just go first and act silly, or informal, or intentionally make a mistake. You break the old rule where power=perfection and in doing so you're sending a signal that it's okay to ignore this old rule without the world exploding. And then everyone's just so damn relieved that they don't have to engage in this exhausting power play that they act like themselves which tends to be perfectly fine and not overly. In bifo, if you stepped in and told people to behave all the time, it would be way too uptight, so the sleazes would actually be setting the tone. You only have to get firm with people who come in with an active, power play, because people tend to react to the both the solidest and the most different voices, and so those people can upset things very quickly. But people who are sleazy or just clueless don't really affect things, IMHO, unless people overreact to them.
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